daily thoughts 3/19/26

i love making websites

https://otamotsauce.neocities.org/   didnt really update much besides changing the scrollbar... but still. also dont know if its updated yet cuz the scrollbar thing takes a while to load. but the about me page did upload

omg bro making websites is genuinely the most fun thing ever brah. its so fun i wish i learned it sooner. cuz imagine if i had a school project and ppl had to make a slideshow or something and i pull up with an entire custom-made website. i wouldve been so cool. 

i want to make websites on random things now. but god everything costs money

also my website is taking so long to make cuz i need to come up with ideas on how i want it to look like

also i cannot figure out for the life of me why the youtube embed doesnt work bro i literally tried everything and it works on other ppls sites but not mine 💀

jazmine 18th bday

my friends birthday passed so i can finally post this bro i actually cooked on this

song otd 3/17/26

Today's song of the day is Lipslap by Kero Kero Bonito! holy moly bro. i never knew kkb was like genuinely actually good. i only know them from that flamingo song which i found annoying. bro this album is so good im ngl. it just so 2016 coded. 2016 happiness and warm summer/spring weather. this album is just full of the most catchiest songs ever. i love it

daily thoughts 3/16/26

bpd

bro i swear on my soul i have bpd or something cuz i just saw a tweet that i kinda relate to

im not really like this (kinda) its more like i get insanely jealous when my friends have more friends than me. cuz it was my friend's birthday the other day and she went to prom and the beach with her friends and i lowkey wanted to kill myself. i know im a bad person for saying that but i just i cant control my emotions at all. 

but anyways back to the og tweet, im kinda like this but like not really cuz i already tell myself that nobody thinks im important enough 

on my soul i have bpd bro 💔💔i have way too many similarities with other bpd havers. especially the feeling extremely close and in love with ur friends but then suddenly hating them for a certain reason

crazy how god created the i hate my fucking friends and i wished they all died sometimes disorder 😭

daily thoughts 3/15/26

suddenly missing ymo / ryuichi

feel like ive been neglecting them lately cuz of my showa idol phase comig back. but its ok i listened to one of their new live albums today + firecracker on repeat. were so back. i missed them so much. truly. once u listen to ymo theres no going back. once u get into ymo u will never hear greater music again im so serious. greatest band of all time. and so many others will agree with me. i genuinely never seen a ymo hater before

i also miss ryuichi sakamoto so much today. like physically. i wish he was still on this planet. miss you grandpa :(

i hate people!!! 😭😭😭😭

i swear i cant stand anyone irl. especially at school bro. i feel like im in a prison having to share the same world as these people. this is my most teenage-core post yet but idc!!! i cant stand ppl i swear bro. 

theyre all the same 😭😭dress the same, look the same, only watches shows and movies on netflix, doesnt have any prospects other than getting a financially stable job, uses chatgpt, doesnt care abt anything but grades and getting service hours i swear these people are made in a factory bro. theyre all so boring and uninteresting i cant stand it 😭

also im gonna sound like a corny teenager here but i wish i had a special kind of friendship (dont know how to define it) yes i promise i love my friends irl. but i wish i had a friendship where we both actually match each other idk. i feel so out of place in my irl friendships. i dont think any of my friends consider me their best friend 💀barely a footnote. and i just know everyones gonna forget abt me after graduation 😭

like an ideal friendship for me is one where we text eachother often and have similar interests or atleast offer to listen to each others interests, is happy to do stuff with me and actually goes out of their way to hang out with me even when they dont want to, unserious but serious when it needs to be, have relatability, have deep convos, lowkey kinda gay, and also we dont live 500000 miles apart 

is this too much for hopes and dreams

daily thoughts 3/14/26

check out my website i updated it guys: https://otamotsauce.neocities.org/

niche interests

oh ym god bruh i cant stand it when people mention niche interests and its something like ddlc and hetalia like bro those two fandoms are huge 😭😭😭 my interest is so niche the only people who i have to discuss it with is one person on tumblr and like 2 70 year old japanese grandmas.

i feel like niche interests should be categorized into spiritually niche and inherently niche:

cuz i feel like stuff like hetalia and homestuck should be spiritually niche where its a very unique piece of media that appeals to only a specific demographic but still has a very big cult following

while inherently niche stuff is like  stuff that genuinely has like no fandom at all. LIKE MY INTEREST. FOUR LEAVES. its so sad how showa idol fans on the internet only discuss the 80s era and not the 60s-70s era sigh... 

song otd 3/14/26

Today's song of the day is ballet by YMO!!!!!!!!! didnt post a ymo song in a while so let me change that. why is this song kinda soudn like gorillaz.... especially the chorus part. the muffled singing part. 

also kinda unrelated/related but yukihiro takahashi's singing voice is so cute. i like how he slurs his words